One day at a time: this is how I’m doing it right now. There’s no other choice. I cannot take much more, nor worry about everything food- and weight loss-related for the week, or the month, or more.
And to be honest, this is sort of mind-relieving, in a way.
I’m supposed to do that for the rest of my life, right? Get into a lifestyle and not into a diet. Gain healthy habits, lose the lousy ones. Gradually get to naturally choose vegetables and fruits over cake and ice-cream. All that stuff. But sometimes, it’s just so overwhelming, especially when other people around you keep on pointing at how you’re supposed to watch your weight, if you’re not worried about eating that one bretzel, and this, and that.
Yes, I’m currently maintaining at something between 131 and 134 lbs. Yes, I could be losing. Yes, I could do so much more. But I’m also in the process of re-enrolling for all my classes, which takes hours of queuing for like five minutes of telling the teacher that I want group 1 for this class and group 3 for that class. I needed to work on my timetable extra carefully, so that I could ensure at least one day or two half-days that I could actually spend at the office, and not working from home. I am worried. I am stressed. I don’t want to be thinking about food and diets and calories and all that shiz all the frelling time. I’m tired. I need a break from something, and neither school nor work can do at the moment. Therefore, I’m trying to take a break from the food worries.
A break that I can’t totally have, unfortunately. If I go back to bad habits, my body will make me pay. Simple as that.
So I’m taking it one day at a time. After I’ve bought my groceries for the next 3-4 days and somewhat planned healthy meals on a sheet of paper, I cook what takes a long time to be cooked, put it in the fridge, and go do something else. One day at a time. Breakfast, a healthy snack, a healthy lunch, a healthy dinner. I won’t worry about what tomorrow will be made of nor about whether I’ll be eating 1200 calories or 1300. The next day, I just have a look at my lists of ’staple meals’ and what’s in my fridge, and I heat that instead of going to buy take-out. Better eat green beans four times in two days than pizza.
And if at the end of the week I’m still maintaining and not losing, well, poop. Not regaining is my primary goal, for me who’s already at my lowest adult weight ever, so as long as I don’t gain, I can take a breather. When the time comes when I can be fully committed and pumped up to take care of those last ten pounds, or if I go past my current maintenance buffer, I’ll do it. But not right now. Now is not the time. I can’t worry about food for whole weeks or months on top of the rest.
(Yes, I haven’t mentioned exercise. Exercise is alright. I bike for about 1 hour a day, I go jogging on Sundays, and the campus gym reopens next week. Exercise never seems to be the real problem, in fact.)
Maybe this is just like those baby steps. Maybe, sometimes, looking at the bigger picture can actually be a weakness, rather than an efficient way of tackling the problem. Do I really want to plan my meals for the next three months or put some pressure on myself about losing X lbs. by October when I know I can’t be 100% committed, when work and school and homework come first? No. I do a little, everyday, and this ‘little’ is anyway better than nothing at all, better than the crap I wa doing before. There’s no point in shooting for the moon if I’m half-buried in the ground; my first concern should be to get out of the ground to start with.
One day at a time. This I can do. If one day isn’t perfect, if one day contains a slice of cake, that’s okay: I have the next meal to fall back on my feet. And then the next day, which I’ll worry about at breakfast.
I gotta do what works for me. Right now, I can’t do much more than that.
September 20th, 2007 at 03:46
Knowing this is a lifestyle change can be downright scary. Facing that kept me from getting on the healthy path for the longest time. I was petrified, that without my friendly, comfortable, unhealthy favorites, I’d never persevere. But, you’ve got the answer. It truly is a day, an hour and sometimes a minute at a time. Eight months down the road, most of those fears have faded for me, thanks heavens! Keep up your good work.
September 20th, 2007 at 07:18
The funniest thing in all of this IMHO is that, in the end, it’s not so complicated nor hard, but it’s the whole “have to do everything at once for it to be good”, or whatever else that mindset may be called. I know many people tend to think this way, and it’s not as simple as it seems to go past this thinking and apply small changes here and there, for the whole picture to be completed in the end…
Anyway, thanks for your comment, and welcome here.
September 20th, 2007 at 14:39
I think your ‘one day at a time’ strategy is an excellent idea. Especially with all the stress and pressure you’ve got going–no need to put more on yourself.
Seems like you’ve developed lots of healthy habits to help you through each day. Good luck with your new perspective!
September 21st, 2007 at 14:44
Thank you, for I really need it these days!